Saffa Dude

Edgy Tracks...

2010-01-25T14:19:00.000Z

I have spent some time in SA lately and really enjoyed the new music coming from the motherland. There's some brutally edgy stuff that will give goosebumps if you pay attention close enough...

BUT...!

One of the things that grief me about SA is the state of Afrikaans music. Lets be honest, its ballad after ballad by some Boerseun that cant decide if he wants to fix his volla or eat his baby chocolates... argggg

Now There are loads of very creative afrikaans people around. Some of the best art in SA is by Afrikaans people and they cant be denied the status of a creative nation.

But through it all, you find a gem here and there. I was introduced a while ago to the musical ramblings of one Jack Parow as a joke, but the more I listen and read up about the music and the people associated with this artist I find the music and lyrics are much closer to the way the youngn's speak and act and enjoy their lives.

Where was this when I was at varsity?

One of my fav's is Die Heuwels Fantasties. Especially their collaboration with Jack Parow on the "Die Vraagstuk" track.

Listen to it here if you do not know it yet...

More please...!

I'll share some more of my favourite saffa created tracks in the coming weeks...

Spotify me up...

2009-12-09T13:34:00.000Z

In yesterday's post (Take a load off downloads) I mentioned that my digital music purchasing has taken a nosedive since I have signed up to Spotify. I have had some queries from friends of Saffa Dude regarding what Spotify is, how it works and how to get hold of it. Basically many questions stopping just short of "can you eat it".

Here goes my short and simple explanation:

What is Spotify?
In their own marketing words: "Spotify is a new way to enjoy music. Simply download and install, before you know it you’ll be singing along to the genre, artist or song of your choice. With Spotify you are never far away from the song you want."
In Lamens Terms: Its a music streaming service where you install a music player on your PC and have access to millions of songs. You dont own the songs it is streamed from the internet so unfortunately you will need broadband. You can build playlists and buy songs directly from the player (check Take a load off downloads before you do this).

How much does it cost?
Its free, no really its free to stream music at a decent quality level. They do this by anoying you with a 30sec advertisement every 5 songs or so. Still better than radio.
You can sign up to their Premium service which extra functionality like downloading your playlists for off-line playing, no ads better quality and the ability to take your songs with you on your iPhone. You can even sign up for short periods, if you are hosting a party for instance and have built your playlist and want it to play ad-free.

How do I get it?
Because of high demand it is invite only at the moment (invites owned by premium customers), but there is a way of getting round the invite section in certain countries. You will just have to try and see. Click this link to try and sign up invite free.

OK, I've signed up and Installed . Now what?
Start searching for your favourite artists and building your own playlists and bang them on in the background whenever you need to.

To start you up I am sharing a playlist made by a friend with some wicked tunes. Once you have installed the software just click the link to Saffa Dude's Tunes and open it in spotify...

Happy Listening and Stay Classy...

Take a load off downloads...

2009-12-08T09:11:00.000Z

This a song to any MP3 buyers ears. A new comparison website TuneChecker.com compares the prices of mp3 downloads and tells you where you can get that must have track for the lowest possible price.

With the UK Parliament voting on the Digital Economy Bill very soon. The bill earmarked to stop peer-to-peer file sharing I can see this site coming very handy with people making the transfer from illegal to legal downloading.

I have to admit that my music buying has become very minimal since I started using Spotify (invite only at the moment), but there are still the occasional purchase that has to be made for my iPhone. I will definitely be using this site to get the best deal...

Head over there now TuneChecker.com

Singing Like Dumisani

2009-11-25T15:34:00.000Z

After the anthem scandal in France 2 weeks ago I have received a plethora of e-mails mocking Mr Dumisani. Here is two of my favorites...

Click picture to enlarge...

Dumisani gets the Wackhead treatment...

Click Play...

Mama....MAMA...Mama?.....Dada...

2009-11-25T09:18:00.000Z

Some Wednesday entertainment...

I'm a complete catch...

2009-11-23T10:26:00.000Z

Its been a while since I have posted here but I have been receiving this link from a couple of friends and thought I'll share again, cause its class...

http://melodymaker.posterous.com/the-reason-some-girls-stay-single-very-funny

After listening to the original listen to him getting the Wackhead treatment...

Click Play...

10 Hottest Females of 2008

2009-01-21T12:06:00.020Z

It's a bit late, but what the heck it needs to be done. Here are the Saffa Dude's picks for the 10 Hottest Females of 2008.

10. Rihanna
Apparently in her native Barbados they have a holiday every year in her honour, now there's a bit of recognition for ya! We're guessing it's not just because she's their biggest pop export ever and not a one-umbrella-wonder, but also that she has a body that puts Britters to shame!

9. Bar Rafaeli
The Israeli model has taken a leaf out of Gisele's book by dating Leonardo Di Caprio. Let's hope it brings her more fame and puts her on the cover of way more magazines! She makes our list as she is a long time favourite in the annual SA Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition (a publication which Saffadude is very much a fan of). This year was another top edition. Kudos to Bar and to SASI.

8. Ana Ivanovic
Saffadude's interest in Wimbledon 2008 waned dramatically when Miss Ivanovic was knocked out early on. Nevertheless, she is a massive talent, having already made it as an FHM covergirl. Oh yes, she isn't too bad at tennis either.

7. Cheryl Cole
She may be married to one of the biggest tits in Premiership football, but 2008 has proved that Cheryl demands a spotlight of her own. Whether it's boosting single male viewership to the X Factor or gyrating on stage with Girls Aloud, Cheryl is just being all the Geordie that she can be!

6. Olga Kurylenko
If, like Saffadude, you sat anticipating the credits of Quantam of Solace and then went, 'Wait. Who?', don't worry we expect this name to be around some more. Rumoured to be the first Bond girl to ever be asked to reprise her role (no Judi Dench doesn't count). Olga is Ukranian-born and doesn't believe in body doubles. She is also twice divorced at the age of 29. Fiesty!!

5. Lindsay Lohan
The good-girl-gone-bad fantasy kicked itself up a notch in 2008! LiLo became a lesbian! While we all wish she had picked a hotter partner to embark with on her maiden voyage of lesbian discovery, there is no doubt that Lindsay has grabbed a lot of attention back from the rest of the tabloid-loving Hollywood slut-pack. Crashing your SUV under the influence is SOO last year...

4. Kate Hudson
It's no wonder she has guys on the brink of suicide when she dumps them. Sorry Owen. Kate is smoking hot and proved it in her swimsuit in Fool's Gold early in 2008. Keep those intellectual stimulators coming our way!

3. Jessica Alba
Yeah so what if she had a kid this year. We don't feel we need to remind you that Jessica is only 27 and easily one of the hottest women on the planet and will be for quite a few more years.

2. Gisele Bundchen
Gisele has it all; she's the world's highest paid model, is on the covers of women's magazines everywhere and is now engaged to Tom Brady, the treble-Superbowl-winning Patriot's Quarterback and all around Mr America. And here's something I bet you didn't know she had – a twin sister!! Who is also a model!! Hot!! Well she doesn't quite have everything as she doesn't have the Number 1 on our list...

1. Megan Fox
That God chose to create something as hot as Megan is a blessing to us all! Well, we have further good tidings, she is set to grace the big screen at least three times in 2009! This busy girl has been named in several upcoming productions including the Transformers 2, as you should remember it was the first film of the series that brought her to us. Here's to a top year ahead people!

Other names worth putting in the hat: Angelina Jolie, Jessica Biel, Kate Beckinsale, Kiera Knightly, The Shannon Twins, Petra Nemcova. Good luck for 2009 girls!

Contributed by: The Pink Salmon

SAA crew in hot water over drug haul

2009-01-21T11:11:00.006Z

According to the BBC Her Majesty's Revenue & Customs is questioning 15 crew members of an SAA flight at Heathrow airport. The reason: A drug haul of 50kg of cannabis and 4kg of cocaine. Whoever the one or several person(s) are, that is involved in the smuggling, definitely needs to be nominated for a Darwin award in 2009.

The drugs were discovered at a customs checkpoint on Tuesday. Now in my travel and customs experience, I would not have picked Heathrow to bring the contraband through. But maybe its just me being efficient in forward thinking. Maybe its just because I am a law abiding citizen, but I will also not try and walk through Heathrow with (what customs value at) £310,000 worth of illegal substances.

The next question that has to be asked, is why do they get to take 50+kg's of luggage when they only stay at their destination for a few days and only get a disgraceful 20+kg's allowance when I go on holiday for several weeks.

All that is left to be said is: You bloody numbnut(s).

England sack 'The Ego'

2009-01-12T12:15:00.005Z

Nothing fills me with more warmth and all-round well-being than Kevin Pietersen being put in his place. And the English Cricket Board has done that this week!

A crisis emerged in England's management when reports surfaced that the new captain did not see eye-to-eye with coach Peter Moores. Pietersen, as his ego demands, stated that either Moores had to go or he would... And the ECB's response was priceless: 'Nobody gives us ultimatums, on yer bike son.'

I don't know what it will take for old KP to learn that he's not bigger than the game, but let's hope those lessons are extremely painful! The man is a first class twat. Of course the minute you moan about him the English stress to point out that we are just jealous that he's not playing for SA. Hmm.. All I can say is that if he were currently playing for the Proteas, I'd be facing an awful conundrum on whether to continue to give my support to the team. At times, let's face it, even Graeme Smith is a but much to stomach. Whilst arrogance does seem to be a useful tool in world cricket, just look at how well the Aussies exploit it, I think there are times, plenty of times, when the players should just shut up and let their talent do the talking.

My opinion is that yes the guy has talent. But he is too full of himself and is obviously not a team player. Basically he's a knob. And while we are on the subject, he claims that he left South Africa because he had been unfairly treated by the Quota System. Yet if you look at the fact that his debut for Nottinghamshire was at age 21 and he never looked back from there, what exactly was he expecting at home at that young age? Obviously if the talent was there he would have worked his way onto the national scene, but you have to earn your stripes when you live in a country ripe with talent. No, that was too much for The Ego. He preferred to get three lions tattooed to his arm – as if that proves anything other than how much of a tool you are.

I'm sure England and its fans will be quick to forgive him for once again showing off what a knob he is, after all he's their only genuine hope with the bat! But, it's nice to see that even they can cut him down to size.

Have your say in our Vote section in the far right column.

Contributed by: The Pink Salmon

Return of the Blog

2008-12-15T10:10:00.000Z

It's safe to say that Saffa Dude is officially up and running again (although let's call it a light jog for now). After a bit of a hiatus, the blog has been brought back, with a new layout nog al (we hope you like it).

Going forward, with the help of a couple contributors, we hope to explore even more avenues of laid-back, humorous drivel and egomaniacal opinion - all with the aim of tickling your funnier bones, even if only for a few minutes each week.

After all, Saffa Dude is committed to pumping out the same chilled-out vibe that we cultivate in our own lives and spreading it to others. We do enjoy a good chuckle as much as the next man (we probably enjoy a good alcoholic beverage more than him too). So it is that we feel the need to share these thoughts with you.

It's here for your entertainment. Take what you will!

The Dead Horse Theory

2008-12-09T12:29:00.005Z

Dakota Native American tribal wisdom, passed on from generation to generation, says:

"When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount and get a different horse."

However, in educative, corporate and governmental Southern Africa, more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:

1. Buying a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

4. Arranging to visit other countries to see how other cultures ride dead horses.

5. Lowering the standards so that the dead horse can be included.

6. Reclassifying the dead horse as 'living impaired'.

7. Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.

8. Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.

9. Providing additional funding and / or training to increase dead horse's performance.

10. Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse's performance.

11. Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, carries lower overheads and therefore contributes substantially more to the bottom line of the economy than do some other horses.

12. Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses.

And of course ...

13. Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position!

If you understand the above, then you are obviously a South African.

Switzerland joins Schengen Visa Scheme

2008-12-08T14:25:00.006Z

SD's friends in the travel industry have alerted me to the fact that the list of countries that South Africans can travel visa free has shrunken by one. And its a European favourite.

From 12th December 2008, Switzerland will become part of the Schengen visa scheme, and those usually requiring a Schengen visa will no longer be able to enter with their residency status alone (as is currently the case). Those entering Switzerland prior to 12th December may still enter on the existing residency rule.

For those travelling in the holiday season between 12th Dec 08 – 5th Jan 09, the Embassy are currently issuing visas valid for Switzerland only. These applicants must be travelling by air to Switzerland only, and not already holding a valid Schengen visa. The Embassy recommends if you have a client wishing to travel between these dates who will require a visa, they should apply as soon as possible.

We have been informed by the Embassy that submission for Swiss visas will be by personal application only, by appointment. If you are in London this can be arranged by calling 09065 771222. There is no current indication how far ahead appointments are being made. Once submitted, if all requirements have been met and the applicant is not referred, processing will take 2 working days.

Another one bites the dust....

If you can drive like that, drive an ambulance

2008-12-05T13:04:00.005Z

Sticking with our motorsport theme today, I thought I'll share this beauty. I dont need to say much about this, just watch the video and keep your jaw from dropping (its fly season).

The Power of Dreams turns to Hours of Screams...

2008-12-05T11:50:00.005Z

Honda announced today that Jenson and his mates at the Honda F1 team are out of a job as the the Credit Crunch hits the first F1 team. They are all due to receive a letter before Christmas confirming they are to be made redundant.

O my shattered nerves!!! If Honda has problems staying in F1 are we going to see Formula 1 racing with just 2 teams next year??? Not sure it will be any different from this year. Maybe we should just give the trophy to Lewis now and call F1 off next season.

Honda's Racing team employs about 800 people directly with their HQ in in Brackley, Northamptonshire. They are now looking for a buyer and hopefully the team can be sold and we'll see their name change and still be in the running for 14th spot.

According to the BBC News

Honda will assume the existing debts, and, it is understood, will sell the team for a nominal figure - perhaps as little as £1, said BBC sport correspondent Adam Parsons.

Honda have won only one race in the past three seasons and last year achieved only one podium position thanks to Rubens Barrichello.

Jenson Button is the other driver in the team.

The team's total budget for the past year, including work done in Britain and Japan, is believed to be just short of $500m.

Adam Parsons said this was "a stunning shock" for motor racing.

He said Honda was considered one of the best funded and most dedicated teams, despite its poor results.

Who wouldnt be interested to buy all that investment at Credit crunch Prices? I am starting a pool and have added my life savings (£2.43).

SA Blogs: Links Added

2008-12-05T10:57:00.006Z

I have added some links to some popular South African blogs that I read. See the "What we read..." section on the right or click continue reading to find out more.

Here they are in no particular order...

ChumpStyle
Urban Ninja
Wat Kyk Jy?
Keo
2Oceansvibe
Splattermail
Baglett
SA Rocks
6000 miles from civilisation...

Saffa's Song of the Week [wk49 - 08]

2008-12-05T09:42:00.005Z

The Enemy - Away From Here

This is an oldie but its a goody and sums up perfectly how I felt about work this week.
They have a sound that has to grow on you. I find it a bit like the same process of getting to know and love Kings of Leon. I have seen them live twice at UK festivals and have to say that I was surprised at how many of their songs I know without actively following the band. Here is The Enemy's website is saying about what they are up to these days:

Scheduled for release in April 2009, The Enemy are currently recording the eagerly anticipated follow-up to their all-conquering debut album 'We'll Live and Die in These Towns' at studios in Coventry and London with producer Mike Crossey (Arctic Monkeys, Razorlight, Foals, The Zutons). The Enemy recently confirmed their biggest headline tour to date for March and April next year which concludes at London's Brixton Academy. All of the twenty-two shows at major venues are either sold out or will soon be.

'We'll Live and Die in These Towns' hit the top of the album charts and was soon certified Platinum, ensuring The Enemy's status as one of the UK's biggest bands in the process. They also earned a plethora of major awards including NME and Q's Best New Band and XFM's Best Debut Album. Having played at the Reading and Leeds festivals and the BBC's Electric Proms, they also headlined NME's Rock & Roll Riot tour before heading to Japan for the first time. They also made history with two phenomenal homecoming shows at Coventry's Ricoh Arena.

Buy: We'll Live and Die In These Towns (MP3)

Amazon Launches MP3 Downloads in the UK

2008-12-04T11:28:00.003Z

Amazon.co.uk yesterday launched an iTunes rivalling MP3 store. They offer over 3 million songs as they teamed up with Sony BMG, Universal Music, EMI Music and Warner Music.

With the launch it is offering some of the currently top selling albums (like the SD's album of the year Only By The Night by the Kings of Leon) at half price, which equates to £3 per album or 69p per song.

The big advantage here is that it is DRM (Digital Rights Management) free. This means like unlike music you have bought from iTunes you can play it on any device and any number of devices (PC, laptop, iPod, any other MP3 player etc.)

Play.com already offers DRM free downloads at with better quality. Play.com encodes they files at 320 kbit/s, iTunes at 128 kbit/s and Amazon at 256 kbit/s. The quaility does not double as as the bit rate doubles, and you would probably not hear the difference on your standard iPod headset, but for the audiophiles out there that play their MP3'3 over a sound system, there will be a difference.

It didn't take long however for the Pirates to spoil Amazon's party. Some upstart coders have already created a Firefox plug-in that links the e-tailer's service to The Pirate Bay and give you the ability to download the tracks for free or the price of a internet connection. The creators of the software says this about their affiliation with Pirate Bay

“We are not affiliated with The Pirate Bay, and do not host or even link to any illegal content,”

Isn't it just great that the people who sell the guns cannot be prosecuted for what you do with the gun.

Click this link to check out Amazon's MP3 Store.

iTunes is dead long live Amazon...!

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED?

2008-12-03T11:19:00.004Z

Some light entertainment laced with interesting links for Wednesday afternoon...

Men Are Just Happier People

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Your underwear is R15.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes [DKW's - Thats Dans, Werk, Kerk] - one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

You are just jealous because the voices only talk to me

2008-12-02T15:26:00.005Z

This not only a favourite old bumper sticker (not that SD condones bumper stickers in any way, shape or form), but it is absolutely ridiculous that that some people actually think that they can get away with stuff as long as God told them to dot it.

A man from Texas shows us how...

This guy in San Antonio, Texas rammed a woman's car off the road at 100mph (160kph) because God told him "she needed to be taken off the road."

Click this link to read the complete article on what happens when the voices start to speak to you.

Beware the voices...

Online picture viewing made less cumbersome with Cooliris

2008-12-01T15:19:00.008Z

Here at SD we view a lot of photos online. Whether its Facebook, Google Images, Flickr, or some random art from the various websites like deviantArt. My one gripe has always been the waiting time for pictures to load while you scroll from one page of thumbnails to the next.

Cooliris brings us the solution. It mimics the idea of Microsofts Photosynth project of displaying the pictures you want to see as a scrollable and zoomable wall.

Cooliris has been around for a while (now version 1.9) and I have using it for about 4 months. It works as a neat little plug-in to your web browser (Firefox or IE) that will add a icon to any a picture on any Cooliris enabled website (which are most of the ones you use). Clicking the icon takes you to full screen view of a wall of the pictures affiliated with the one clicked on (i.e. Facebook album, Google Image search, etc.). From here you can easily scroll through the pictures open them in the web browser and generally just muck about.

They have a code you can embed on your website with links to you Flickr photos or any RSS picture feed. Below is an example of a random Flickr feed.

Get Adobe Flash

To find out more and install this free plug-in go to Cooliris' Website.

Saffa's Song of the Week [wk48 - 08]

2008-11-27T14:44:00.006Z

DJ Mei-Lwun - How Low (DJ Mei-Lwun Refix)
Flo-Rida vs. Public Enemy vs. Benny Benassi

Check this mash-up out by DJ Mei . If you don't start dancing immediately , check your pulse.

When Mei-Lwun releases a new bootleg, you can usually count on a really solid effort. This one goes beyond solid. Pure thumpy electro hip-hop gold, tailor-made for Electro-Bootie. This one's a dance floor banger, pure and simple.

Click for Download

Free portable iPod speakers (CupSpeakers)

2008-11-27T10:38:00.010Z

Going on holiday soon and want to take your tunes with you to play on the beach etc. Dmitry Zagga brings us the perfect "iPod Ghetto Accessory".

Using 4 paper cups and some toothpicks you can transform your iPod earphones into a minimalistic Ghetto Blaster. This is probably one of the most ingenious alternative hacks I have seen to use you iPod / MP3 Player without spending a fortune.

CupSpeakers [Dmitry Zagga]

The first rule of lamb club...

2008-11-24T11:05:00.007Z

With the SA summer holidays coming up The Guardian provides a step-by-step guide to butchering a lamb carcass that will get get any South African males testosterone pumping.

Happy chopping...

Mothers hide your children...

2006-05-25T11:03:00.001+01:00

Mothers, hide your children...

Zoo's, hide your monkeys...

Plastic Surgen's, get your scalpels ready...

Cause MJ is coming to town.

"US pop icon Michael Jackson has told a newspaper he wants to live in Britain because he loves the country.

Speaking to the tabloid Daily Mirror in an interview published on Thursday" News24

Saffa

Dream Holiday

2006-05-24T16:57:00.001+01:00

You might have noticed the Saffa being a little blog lite lately. Well here is why...

So The Saffa decided to go on a holiday in Alexandra. He searched high and low for a good deal on a lastminute booking. Scouring the Internet and phoning every imaginable travel agent but he finally got this –5* hotel. Never would he imagine that a place like this existed. A dream holiday indeed…

Here are the pics of this once in a lifetime visit hotel (if you drift my meaning…)

I still have dreams (if that is what i should call them) about dodging bullets while having tea on the balcony...

But beyond the murdering and plundering going on all around The Saffa considers him lucky being a temporary resident here, cause notable residents and ex-residents of Alexandra include:

Nelson Mandela
Zanele Mbeki (wife of President Thabo Mbeki)
Mark Mathabane (Tennis player and author of the autobiography Kaffir Boy).
Samora Machel (former Mozambiquan President)
Alfred Nzo (South African Minister of Foreign Affairs 1994-1999)
Joe Modise (South African Minister of Defence 1994-1999)
Hugh Masekela (musician and trumpeter)

Saffa

James Bland...

2006-05-19T15:18:00.001+01:00

Another cracker loaded on YouTube. The Clip is from a BBC series called "Dead Ringers". One of my fav sketch shows. I know, I know, its sad but in this world you have to find something to make you laugh.

Its a spoof of the much beloved (by every 10 year old girl or gay man of any age) "Beautiful" video from James Blunt... Enough, have a look and turn it up. Enjoy...

Saffa

Bike with Baalz...

2006-05-19T14:53:00.001+01:00

Firstly, all apologies for the lack of posts lately. I have now recovered from my vegestative, bloggers block state and back with avengence, with some schweet surprizes. Watch this space..

To kickstart (pun intended) the Saffa Dude's spot again: In the words of Borat (our Kazchstani friend) WOW-WOW-WIE-WA. I want one, I want two, Dammit give me a dozen. This offroad bike dubbed "BAAL" is a concept entered into the MichellinChallange Design. Still just a concept, but as soon as this goes to market, it will definitely feature in the Saffa Dude's - Must Have's section.

" It is based on a bendable rubber track that guarantees maximum traction as well as freely changeable directions. To make the handling more comfortable and interesting, the vehicle is steered by hands and feet

The displayed models use 500 ccm ATV Motor which are already mass produced. In general, this engine concept makes many different terms of use possible. In this case, two of them were further developed.

Baal uses the engine concept and its unbeatable off road advantages as a race device. Made for professional riders, it has a very light body and a broad handlebar. This concept could take part in rallies Paris-Dakar or the Baja races. "

As I said, Sign Me Up for a dozen...

Saffa Dude

The Devil went to Cape Town...

2006-05-19T09:53:00.000+01:00

After the CT riots, I thought this one would be very appropriate. Geniet dit...

The devil goes to Cape Town, meets Gatiep and asks: "Do you know who Iam?"

Gatiep replies: " Nei man. Djy's nie vannie kaap nie, give me ahint."

The devil says : "I'm the prince of darkness."

Gatiep exclaims: "Ooh, djy's 'n bigshot by Eskom!"

What is that?

2006-05-16T13:40:00.000+01:00

Is it a BIRD?

Is it a PLANE?

NO!

IT'S SUPERDOOS!!!

Winter is here...

2006-05-16T10:52:00.000+01:00

With winter arriving in Brakpan, its time to get out that old seat warmer...

So much...

2006-05-15T14:28:00.000+01:00

Yes, So much to write today, but to little time, so here is some entertaining links...

Wendel Sailor. The Big Fast Dumb - LINK

Those hot cutie celebs doing what they do best, sell-it girls - LINK

Camron Diaz, schweeter than pie. As long as you dont ask for her autograph - LINK

Tom Cruise remains a lo-ooo se her in the: Tom vs Bugatti stand-off - LINK

Sir Alan Sugar: Better than a singing fish - LINK

Best Movie Scenes #2 - Plot Twist

2006-05-15T10:54:00.000+01:00

The second installment of best movie scenes from the desk of Saffa Dude, looks at plot twists. Thinking of GREAT plot twists quite a few movies jumps to mind. Of which Sixth Sense with Bruce Willis and Haley Joel Osmond was the first to that I could think of. Definitely a great twist and without the revelation the film would probably be pretty average.

The next to grab my attention is Primal Fear with Richard Gere and Edward Norton in which Norton delivers one of his trademark performances a s a priest killer with multiple personality syndrome. Norton is so convincing in his portrayal of this character that you would never guess the true outcome that is revealed in the last 2 minutes of this film.

The two films mentioned above is top notch examples of unforgettable plot twists but the Saffa Dude #1 spot goes to Kaiser Soze. The character portrayed as the Devil reincarnated by Kevin Spacey in The Usual Suspects. With a star studded cast and Spacey's delectable story telling as a cripple throughout the movie. Although several hints are dropped throughout the movie regarding the real identity of Kaiser Soze, they are not recognizable until the movie is watched for a second time.

So the #1 spot goes to: The Usual Suspects
Cast: Stephen Baldwin, Gabriel Byrne, Benicio Del Toro, Kevin Pollak, Kevin Spacey, Chazz Palminteri
Favorite Quote: "The greatest trick the devil has ever played, was to convince the world he does not exist."

Other movies that deserves a mention:
The Matrix (Scene where Neo is "unplugged" for the first time and sees the tower of human batteries)
Fight Club (another undeniably awesome performance by Edward Norton)
The Shawshank Redemption
Lucky Number Slevin
12 Monkeys

Saffa Dude

Russian Model's "Blonde" Moment

2006-05-12T11:34:00.000+01:00

This poor little Russian model (Tatyana Simanava), mistook the emergency exit on a coach in NY for the facilities door and fell straight out of the bus, nearly landing under the weels.

The poor kitten's shoulder, arm and face took a bit of a trashing that "would put her carreer on hold for a bit". This just goes to show why every beatiful girl always has a posse of mingers hanging with them. It's to check signs, explain the instructions on packaging, etc.

Although the utter ignoramus like behaviour should be treated with no compassion at all, I cannot help but to take another look at the picture and my hart bleeds...

I will be starting the "Help Tatyana Get Better (at reading) Fund" next week. Any donations of books for 2-5 year olds welcome.

Saffa

New Zealand up for Sale on Ebay

2006-05-12T10:48:00.000+01:00

In my days, I have seen some healthy and unhealthy Kiwi / Aussie rivalry. But this has to take the cake.

Alledgedly, this Aussie bloke from Brisbane tried to sell New Zealand on ebay. Ebay put a stop to the sale, but you have to give it to this guy for having balls and pronouncing to the world that he hates Kiwi's.

The add has been taken off with the price standing at $3050 and was titled "New Zealand: Slightly Used". The seller goes on to say on the add "Its no longer required", "Comes with heaps of sheep", "Very ordinary weather" and my personal favorite "The dogiest American Cup win ever".

Whoever you are "mate", I will not leave my house for a few few days and not cross that border ever in my life again.

Watch the ONENews report here.

Do you guys think there is any way Ebay will allow us to offload Mogabe, not that I think we'll get much.

Saffa Dude

Do you hate your job?

2006-05-12T09:50:00.000+01:00

When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this. On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson. Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed. Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favourite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken. Now the fun part begins.

Take out the literature and read it carefully. You will notice that in small print there is a statement, "Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is "personally tested". Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so glad I do not work in the Thermometer quality control at Johnson & Johnson."

HAVE A NICE DAY AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ASS THAN YOURS.

Jamie Pressley

2006-05-11T12:54:00.000+01:00

One for the Boys...

Jamie Pressley in Maxim UK. I need no more reason to post this link...

Saffa

Round the world trip for a Cash Machine

2006-05-11T09:49:00.000+01:00

G'day peeps. I feel like sharing this one.

As you know I am reside in London town and I earn my cash, in a part of town called Holborn (pronounced Ho'burn). Well... Yesterday, around 1pm I decide to do my daily sandwich run. Relishing the opportunity to catch some of this weird thing everybody has been talking about. I think they call it sunshine (or something like that), that I still believe this is just a myth in London. But let me not deviate from the essence of the story.

To buy my beloved sandwich I need somefinc called cash. Now, I have heard that this "cash" can be obtained at, what is called a "cash machine". Great, I can already taste the chicken, ham and cheese toasted chiabata... I am ready to go.

One Problem: I don't know where the nearest "cash machine" is. But hey, this is the digital age where you can find anything on the net. I hop over to my trusty Barclays website and within a few clicks I am at the "Branch and cash machine locator". I select "Barclays/Woolwich cash machine" and type in "Holborn" in the "London street" section and slam that "Next" button quicker than Latvian can get a pub job.

The list of results pop up immediately (I love my broadband). And you think that would be it. I am off to go get a my lunch.

Second problem: See if you can spot it.

You got it! 14,913.8 Miles to the nearest cash machine. I bet this site has already booked me a ticket on BA and check me in on there online check in system.

After recovering from shock me colleague told me there is one just up the street. And its definitely not 14,000+ miles away. The sweet relief... Allegedly Barclays have hooked up with Multimap on this and Multimap is to blame.

You'll be happy to know that I did get my sandwich and I dint have to travel to Antigua to get the cash. Although that might have been a good trip.

Saffa

Say no more...

2006-05-11T09:28:00.000+01:00

Breathtaking...

2006-05-10T16:24:00.000+01:00

Nasa has made public some stunning Hi Res images of the little blue marble we live on. I had some problems getting on to this site. Guess its overloaded by members of the Where is Wally Society...

"This spectacular "blue marble" image is the most detailed true-color image of the entire Earth to date. Using a collection of satellite-based observations, scientists and visualisers stitched together months of observations of the land surface, oceans, sea ice, and clouds into a seamless, true-color mosaic of every square kilometre (.386 square mile) of our planet. These images are freely available to educators, scientists, museums, and the public. This record includes preview images and links to full resolution versions up to 21,600 pixels across."

Here is the link to the full catalogue...

Saffa Dude

Not the daddy...

2006-05-10T15:27:00.000+01:00

This video clip of a guy finding out that he is not the father of some ho's kid, after DNA testing, is a must watch. Now this is how you celebrate... Watch and enjoy.

I think this is what Zuma felt like on the inside walking out of that courtroom yesterday. The only down side (for him) to him getting off is that he will never be able to become President. Spending time in the slammer is one of the prerequisite's for become the RSA Chief in Command, isn't it? If so, then ET is on up on you old boy and he also doesn't have to go for a test in a few months time. The Zuma camp is probably cheering that he doesn't get off so easy in the upcoming fraud trial.

Aquila has also brought us this one from the desk of the Madam and Eve creators. Chuck for President!!!!

Saffa Dude

Bush gets it..

2006-05-09T14:22:00.000+01:00

Doesn't really matter if you are a fan of George Dubya Bush or not. This video of Stephen Colbert (host of Comedy Central's fake news show) at the Washington Annual Correspondence Association Dinner ripping into the USA president and the stateside media armed with nothing but razer sharp, Minora Blade like, anecdotes is one of the most entertaining things doing its rounds on the net.

After watching it, it did not find it all surprising that the US press did not cover this bit of the evenings procedings at all. As they say: Freedom and Democracy means you can do or say anything you please, as long as you don't say anything about the guys who "control" that same Freedom and Democracy...

This wants me dig into Zuma a bit, but I'll leave that for another post.

Enjoy...

Part 1

Part 2

Day of Glory - Forever

2006-05-08T13:20:00.001+01:00

Yes, my friends. We all asked for it and now its here (well nearly).

Cricket South Africa has announced that they will be releasing a DVD of that gargantuan game of cricket that was played between the Proteas and Aus on 12 March 2006 (or "12/3 - The day of reckoning" as I like to refer to it). Now you can re-live every ball-crunching moment of the match, with some 20-20 action thrown in on as well. This time however you can enjoy the B E A Utiful batting in its full glory, without crying or jumping around (still optional), pausing to grab another beer...

The DVD will be available in shops 22 May and also on Kalahari.net

And please make sure that you are watching this when your Aussie mates come over for a quick visit (although this might result in a retraction of that invite to that free holiday in Aus). I have already ordered Ricky a copy...

Live the dream, over and over and over and over again...

Saffa Dude

Shane on you!!!

2006-05-08T11:27:00.001+01:00

Old Warney has done it again. In an article (NSFW) in yesterday's edition of The News of the World have published pictures (NSFW) of old Warney having a romp with two very agreeable young ladies. One of which is a MTV presenter.

The Man is a living legend indeed...

Saffa

The Cousin is coming to town...

2006-05-08T10:17:00.000+01:00

Hear ye, Hear ye...

My Cousin Barry Hilton will be doing a few gigs in London at the end of June. Get your tickets from his website NOW!!

The big night is on the 1st of July at the Slut and Legless in Fulham. Its the same day as the middel weekend of the Wimbledon tennis. A great way to end a long day at the tennis...

Saffa

What Rooney could learn from rugby

2006-05-06T19:28:00.001+01:00

Pardon my utter laziness in commenting, just read this...

Saffa

A lovely gift...

2006-05-05T16:59:00.000+01:00

Any wanting to buy there better (or worse half) a fluffy gift. Please check this one out before you go to any old teddy bear store...

Geniet dit...

Saffa

What have we become...

2006-05-05T12:29:00.001+01:00

It's sad I know... But yet in some strange way very funny...

Cry Baby Flea - RHCP

2006-05-05T10:49:00.000+01:00

Some have you might have noticed the link to Amazon to buy the new RHCP's album Stadium Arcadium in my Must Have's Section. After reading some news today that apparently, some random numbnut has leaked the album on the net before its release next Monday 8th May and Flea's (aka Michael Balzary) emotional (pathetic girl like) plea for people not to download it, I am tempted to remove this link. I have been a keen supporter of this band since I have been knee-high to a lingerie model, but this is one step to far.

I cannot and will never condone the illegal downloading of any music, video, etc. I am just so disappointed that the the best rock bassist known to man can go on like a 5 year old girl that has lost her skipping rope... wtf? You have to read it for yourself here, but I have copied some extracts for your entertainment...

"that's not very nice
if you down load it now off one of these file sharing sites you will be getting a pale imitation of the record it will be of the poor sound quality of the technique they used to get it on there and
that will break my heart
it will break john frusciante's heart
it will break anthony kiedis's heart and
it will break the heart of chad smith"

He then goes on to admit that there are more (business) reasons for his lame plea to the real RHCP's fans...

"and it is sad to me for the business reasons of course"

And the clincher at the end...

"yes, it is stealing from us, and that is lame
everyone has to live with their own conscience on that one
let it be your guide
but to take a version that has been defiled sound wise
a version in which some idiot has taken our year and a half of soul
baring work and pissed all over it that will break our hearts "

I for have already pre-ordered my copy and old Michael, John, Anthony and Chad don't have to worry about me stealing their souls and "pissing all over it". Don't worry old boy. The search party for your bollocks will be back soon. Once all that lovely green bills come flooding from us poor little law abiding citizens of RHCP land.

For those of you in the UK. They will be screening "Red Hot Chili Peppers live at Alcatraz!" on MTV 6th, 7th May 8pm, 5pm and keep an eye open for the upcoming gigs this summer all over the UK (if you can still get tickets), you will not regret seeing these guys live.

Enjoy, and please buy the album. We don't wants Flea's mommy calling our parents and getting us grounded...

Saffa

TGIF...

2006-05-05T09:54:00.000+01:00

Here we are at the end of sweating out another backbreaking four day week. And to celebrate the coming of two days of glorious weekend, here is something that has to make every man smile. And if it doesn't, we'll send out a search party for your marbles...

As some of you might already know. Our beloved Kelly Brook stars in a new movie titled THREE. Apart form the corny tagline "Three arrive. Only two survive." this is what one reviewer had to say on the IMDb website:

"This movie was much better than I was expecting. You know, late-night cable cheesecake movie, and it's true that the spectacular Kelly Brook spends almost all of her screen time in a tiny white bikini, gets naked and has very hot sex with abandon with both of her costars. And the wretched soundtrack certainly fits the genre. But the acting of the whole cast rises above the material. Kelly Brook delivers a very solid and believable performance, and Billy Zane completely nails his part in a deeply human and nuanced tour de force. Perfect stealth date movie--good enough for a woman to enjoy it as a drama, and yet so hot she'll want to jump your bones as soon as it's over."

Although it might be a movie for the DVD collection I am strangely tempted to go and oogle at a 15ft Kelly at the cinema.

Here is another little link for you guys that have to much time to waste...

Saffa

Just do it...

2006-05-04T10:37:00.000+01:00

I feel very in touch with humanity today (probs because the sun is shining in London, very rare as you guys know).

So I am doing my bit to speak out against slave labor...

Watchit...

Saffa Dude

Mr T takes on Dr Phil

2006-05-03T15:41:00.000+01:00

The wish granting leprechaun has been good to us this year and it is not about to stop. According to News24 Mr T is going to host a talk show Dr Phil style.

"The 'T' stands for talking," Mr. T said in an interview with The Associated Press. "I'm going to talk it up. It's what I've been doing all my life."
The series starts in October. He will offer help to people struggling with personal or professional problems.
"My show aint no `Dr. Phil,' with people sitting around crying," he said. "You're a fool - that's what's wrong with you. You're a fool if you don't take my advice."

If this doesn't air in the UK I am gonna beat some sucka fools to pulp...

Saffa

Zuma: Always just promises...

2006-05-03T11:17:00.000+01:00

I try to stay away from politics on this site, but Ostendo have posted this beauty. And since SA politics is more like a episode of Prison Break, I could not resist.

A solution for Cape Town power cuts...

2006-05-03T10:32:00.000+01:00

With the Cape Town power cuts a distant memory, I doubt if this is any use to anyone. But anyone who has lived in SA for more than a month would know that the story is not finished and everybody can be reading at candles and playing monopoly (no TV), again very soon.

I found the solution. Its called ECube and quoting Gizmodo "ECube Laughs At Power Cuts".

Get one now, before your neighbor does...

Another nifty gadget brought to you by Saffa Dude.

Product link: ECube: Emergency Relief Unit

Best Movie Scenes - Dogfight

2006-05-02T18:33:00.000+01:00

I was recently asked, what the best scene in a movie ever. And the numbnut that asked me actually expected me to come up with answer right there and then to the all time greatest scene EVER, so that he can probably just come up with a better one 10 secs later and take all the glory in the group.

Now there is no such thing as a best scene. All our half educated movie lovers know that, but what I am gonna do is dig out a few categories and over the next few weeks find the my favorite scene by category.

To kick off.. I chose the action genre. And in particular a good old all American airforce dogfight. Nothing better in than (except maybe p*rn) to get the heartrate shooting through the roof and feeling like you have been strapped in a jet fighter yourself.

The scene I am referring to ins at the start of the movie "Behind Enemy Lines". The director did a great job here to get you interested in sitting all the way through this film, that looses almost all speed after this scene and crawls to and end. But you have to give them credit for this scene. Getting the Saffa Dude No. 1 spot in the Fighter Pilot (Dogfight) category, even though they get shot down. Its just B..E..A..Utiful to watch.

Here is the clip...

Saffa

Keira Knightley does it for us...

2006-05-02T15:48:00.000+01:00

Before I properly congratulate Kiera personally this weekend, I thought I'll post a congratulatory post on the blog for her being voted FHM's sexiest woman of the year.

It will be only rude not to mention the other nine angels in the Top 10...

1. Keira Knightley
2. Keeley Hazell
3. Scarlett Johansson
4. Angelina Jolie
5. Kelly Brook
6. Cheryl Tweedy
7. Beyonce Knowles
8. Evangelina Lily
9. Jessica Alba
10. Jessica Simpson

Saffa

All hail the Queen...

2006-04-28T14:36:00.000+01:00

On one of my exciting journeys though the world wide wonderland and specifically the BBC News site I came across this beauty, that describes

Apparently there is a massive uproar regarding the Rough Guide to England publishing that:

England is a nation of "overweight, alcopop-swilling, sex-and-celebrity obsessed television addicts".

Bwahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa! What a beauty!!! Looking at the papers published in the UK you would think that this kingdom is being run by chav's, football supporters and big breasted, blond celebrities and not the American Side-Show that they call parliament.

Alcohol, sex and TV are three of the things I (and to be honest most people I know) have based my life philosophy around and I am proud of the English nation for embracing my culture and outlook on life.

I can see how the tourism board would be upset by this, but you cannot help to laugh out loud as you know there is so much truth said in jest, or in the Rough Guide to England in this instance.

With Mayday coming up, hope you all have a booze, sex and celebrity filled long weekend...

Adios,

Saffa

Not that we need it...

2006-04-27T16:52:00.000+01:00

I have put copy this book in the post to all my mates. I cant wait to see what happens over the next few weeks...

Thanks Aquila

Saffa

Pablo Francisco Impressions

2006-04-27T15:04:00.000+01:00

By a show of hands we will now indicate to rest of the world who doesn't like stand-up. OK. Now, all of you with your hands up don't watch this clip. For those who havge their hands down: Watch this... I have watched it 3 times and still have stomach cramps laughing...

World Stats

2006-04-27T10:30:00.000+01:00

Here s a interesting one for ya. A site keeping track of world population stats etc. I know its probably a waste of time but hey, who here doesn't have a few minutes a week to waste on some useless information. We all listen, watch or read the weather forecast everyday, don't we?

Saffa

Watch, Listen and be informed...

2006-04-26T15:15:00.000+01:00

A gadget to watch, sing to and never ignore...

If you are anything like my flatmate and enjoy exercising your vocal cords in the shower to some "Leaving on a jet plane" or "Billy Jean" (without the laminated words stuck to the shower wall). You definitely need a shower radio... If only for the sanity of your flatmate(s)\neighbours. If you are also inclined to be 10 mins late for everything because you love a good long shower, like me. You definitely need a clock in the shower too.

Now this little gadget solves both these problems, but I can hear you screaming: "What's new!!". Well. You tell me how many times you have jumped out of the shower to the the irritating noise of you phone ringing, to run half naked down the corridor dripping water all over the place to get to the phone and find out its your mother calling you to remind you to put out the garbage for collection today. AAAAAAAAAARRRGH...!

This little gadget is packed with a surprise of note. Caller ID. Now can check if its your secret lover phoning and run for the phone before your other half gets to it or your boss and just ignore it. I have tried to find a UK vendor, but could only find this American website selling it. Hope to see it over here soon.

Saffa

Men will be men...

2006-04-25T16:24:00.000+01:00

In other words always better. This is an old one but I think a good one to set the tone for the new website. I have to say that I never get tired of reading this inspiring piece of "reality e-mail".

The paper written by allegedly two American college students is treat in the long debated discussion of who reigns supreme: He vs. She.

Enjoy,

Saffa

The Saffa Dude's Bloggeroo

2006-04-25T10:51:00.000+01:00

Aloooo y'all...

I have decided to move my blog from MSN spaces due to the restrictions on formatting the page that Microsoft put on these sites. I hope you you enjoy reading my blog that is filled with all kinds of mad ramblings by me and guest writers on anything from technology to how to peal an onion. Add this site to your Favourites NOW or subscribe to the RSS feed...!!

You can check out my previous posts at Finc's MSN Space to get an insite into what goes on in the mind of a nutter...

Looking forward to reading your comments on my posts soon...

The Dude